So rat bastard was hiding from ME!  I sent him a bunch of nasty grams demanding he shop for ME and he ignored them.  But today the fucking little rat turd finally caved!   Stupid little man!   I’m all ready for round 2!!  I’ll be fluffing MY wishlist JUST for you, asshole!!  I think you need to sacrifice even more to make up for your piss poor behavior!
MUAHAHAHHAHA!
Here’s the tally for today.  Since I don’t have MY “secret wishlist” available for the drooling masses to view, I’ll list everything he got here.  Only a handful of guys are allowed to shop the “secret” wishlist. 
$2100 cash
$300 Lowes Gift card
$140 Teak shower bench
$50 garment rack
printing paper
Snow roof rake
$160 Keurig machine
Dishwashing detergent
big box toilet paper
$50 foot stool
$80 Osprey Daypack
beanie
Billows for fireplace
$150 Amazon gift card tins
$50 Cabelas
Swiffer wetjet refills
$110 Face Cream
makeup concealer
$100 Sephora gift card
$62 Thermostat
$61 Sweater
tshirt
$180 Pendleton throw
$100 air purifier
$50 doormat
$35 boot gaiters
$100 Eddie Bauer
$120 boots
$264 Garmin for hiking and backpacking
$32 top
$26 baking gloves
$24 socks
$240 Helly Hansen purple jacket
$80 under armour top
$90 Wifi Blueray player
$50 winter work gloves